Today is September 11^th, otherwise known as 9/11.  So what the hell is the deal with people who refer to the date as ‘nine-one-one’?  It’s a month and a day – that’s two numbers, not three.  We’re using the freakin’ decimal system here, people.  Eleven is not equal to one and one.  Give me a friggin’ break.

Person1:  “When’s your birthday.”

Person2:  “One-two-four.”

Person1:  “Is that January 24^th or December 4^th?”

Person2:  “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Person1:  “Clarify yourself you ambiguous son of a bitch.”

Where do you people get this crap?

Person1:  “…It’s been that way ever since nine-one-one.”

Person2:  “Nine-one-one?  What the hell is that crap?”

Person1:  “Oh, sorry.  It’s an old family tradition of stupidly mispronouncing things to honor fallen heroes.  On Memorial Day I get dyslexia, and on Veteran’s Day I speak in pig-Latin.”

Person2:  “...”

Person1:  “Eterans-vay.”

Nine-one-one isn’t a date, it’s the number you call when your meth lab starts your parents’ basement on fire.

-FG

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