The worst part about having a birthday is dealing with stupid people’s stupid reactions to finding out that it’s your birthday.  They always have to say something stupid like, “oh, how does it feel to be a year older?” or some other bull-crap line that is so stupid there isn’t really anything you can say to it.  Or, at least there didn’t used to be.  In the interest of public service, I have crafted a universal response that will come in handy any time you find yourself in such a situation:

Person:  “Ooh, its your birthday?  Do you feel any older?”

FG:  “Your choice of conversation is so stupid and lame that, even though I’m about to tell you to shut up and then leave abruptly, I still believe that you will be considered the rude one.”

Person:  “I was just--”.

FG:  “Shut up.”

That should do the trick.  Happy FG-Day.

-FG

P.S.  All birthday gifts can be sent to my PayPal account.

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