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Stop being such a big baby.
Monday, April 3rd 2006
11:42 pm

I saw a news story today about how babies were getting to be too fat to fit into car seats.  They even quoted some expert on the car seat industry.  She wanted them to start making bigger seats, because she was concerned for the safety of the children.  If we’re talking about child safety here, I would be more concerned that so many babies out there are so grossly overweight.

 

Woman1:  “Oh, is this an album of baby pictures?”

Woman2:  “Yep!  Here’s one of Johnny’s first steps.    Here’s one of Johnny’s last steps.  And here’s one of Johnny’s first trip on his Lark™ motorized scooter.”

 

I’m also concerned that these giant babies will somehow take over the earth.  But that’s a lesser concern… for now.

-FG
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Comments:
 
FingerlessGloves - email - website -- posted 4/4/06 at 1:09:58 am
 
 

Woman1:  “Do you remember Johnny’s first words?”

Woman2:  “He told the pizza guy he wanted delivery.”
   
 
Max Powers -- posted 4/4/06 at 3:40:56 pm
 
  What will they think of next, mini canes for babies?
   
 
FingerlessGloves - email - website -- posted 4/4/06 at 6:09:19 pm
 
  It's interesting you should mention that -- originally the closing line was going to be 'Pretty soon they'll have to starting making baby-sized canes.'
   
 
murderbydeath -- posted 4/4/06 at 9:22:19 pm
 
  i like this commenting system. on xanga you would always leave a comment giving us a final word or closure. now you can again. my life is complete.
   
 
stargirlmia89 -- posted 4/5/06 at 9:45:36 pm
 
  agree with the above person. My life is, again, complete. Thank you, FG.
   
 
Matt Miller -- posted 4/6/06 at 12:53:23 am
 
  This new fat baby thing is going to mess up all of your volume calculations that were done with old skinny babies.
   
 
Jake -- posted 4/6/06 at 2:48:21 am
 
  I approve.
   
 
archdukechocula -- posted 4/6/06 at 3:56:08 pm
 
  I'll only begin getting concerned when babies are too large to fit into mailboxes
   
 
Probablility - email -- posted 4/6/06 at 9:59:30 pm
 
  I wonder if this would affect how many dead babies it would take to paint a wall. Originally it mattered on how hard you threw them -and by threw, I mean launched out of a cannon. Now the weight to blood ratio's all thrown off. Damn, that Matt Miller was right. *recalculates*
   
 
Luz -- posted 4/15/06 at 10:48:11 pm
 
  Speaking of dead babies, does that mean that coffins will also have to be redesigned.  The one's for babies anyway.
   

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