The latest generic trend that I’ve been able to find personally offensive:  Whenever you sign up for something or buy something on a website, they always try to get you to sign up for something extra -- a mailing list, their premium service, or some other bullcrap.  And there’s always just two options:

1)      Yes, please sign me up for your bullcrap.

2)      No, thanks.  I’d rather not have your bullcrap now.

You know what?  Neither of those options is going to work for me.  I obviously don’t want to sign up for your bullcrap, but I certainly don’t remember wanting to thank you for the offer.  So listen up Internet:  if you’re going to go through the trouble of trying to verbalize my response, you should at least provide more realistic options.

1) Yes, please sign me up for you worthless garbage.

2) No, thanks.  I don’t want your garbage.

3) A polite but firm ‘no’.

4) Just walk away without saying anything, leaving the offerer slightly offended.

5) Physically attack the offerer.

6) Say you’ll sign up for the service, but give the offerer a fake name.  Then, later, poop in a cup and leave it on his doorstep.

See? Now everyone’s happy..

-FG

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